The excitement that fills my heart now when I look in the
mirror is the fact that I have absolute peace in the perfect presence of
Savior. I no longer strive or try to “order” my own footsteps in this
treacherous world, but rather have such contentment that God has a plan, and no
matter how much it varies from the Etch-a-Sketch I have conjured up in my
tainted heart I know it is the best plan. Always far more awesome than anything
I could have dreamed of, or architected in my little brain, and He delivers it
at exactly the right time for maximum gratification for both of us!!!! Daddy I
want that, and I want it NOW is generally our frame of reference for almost
everything in life, and He longs to give us the desires of our hearts, and when
our hearts are more about seeking the giver rather than the gift we are coming
into alignment with His Grace. I now trust Him with my physical health,
business, lingering consequences of poor choices, my spirit/soul mate, because they
all have been threatened, under attack, or completely obliterated over the last
year and a half, and I had no options but to Trust HIM. It was all out of my
control, and spiraling towards the crust of the earth at 900 miles an hour, and
I just had to sit in a puddle of “me and Him” and say….. You got this? A friend and I prayed
with a woman yesterday who does not know The Lord in a hospital in Nashville
who is about to pay the ultimate price for poor choices as her Liver and Kidneys
are shutting down, and it brought my heart to one of my deepest places despair
and true humility as I prayed for Jesus to heal, deliver, and save, and at the
same time looking at her jaundice filled face, and thought….. for the love of
God there goes Jay Frier. I trust Him for it all, and have no intentions of
trying to make it happen for myself again. His plans ROCK!!!
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